Leader

December 7, 2014

Professor Young

The College of writing

Fairleigh Dickinson University

Dear Reader:

            After a challenging semester I would have to say my first essay about identity is the best. I believe it’s the best because it represents how fare I have come as a writer this semester. When I first arrived at Fairleigh Dickinson my writing was still at a high school level, but with the help of professor young I was able to become much stronger as a writer. She taught me transitions, commas, S.E.E.R, word usage…etc. and I was able to use this information to my advantage making my essay about identity the best.  Another thing that made this piece so great was the amount of mistakes I made on it. In my original work there were countless mistakes and errors but being persistent I was able to learn from these mistakes. I was then able to make effective structured sentences and paragraphs. With being taught new and more effective methods of writing plus learning from my mistakes I was able to create what I would like to say is my best essay ever. This represents me in the course because it shows my ability to learn and adapt which is very important trait to have in life in order to be successful.

            I’ve made quite the few revisions from my first draft to my final one on the essay about identity. I would like to start with my intro and most importantly my thesis. In the first copy my thesis was unclear and weak. My Intro also had argument points that did even appear in the body paragraphs. As for my for my final copy the thesis is well thought out and gives structure to the rest of the body. Another thing I would like to point out is in paragraph three or body paragraph two I made a very big improvement. In my first draft I gave a bad example that was indefinite and pointless. In my final draft I changed that example and related it to myself backing up my point. I first said “For example playing a trumpet might be something that defines someone.” I changed that to “. For example I use to be very into playing guitar and that playing guitar was my identity. When I played guitar everything became clearer. It defined me in that I loved music. I had the rhythm, the passion for it, and strength to stand out or work with others to make sweet music.” This shows how my writing became stronger, how I’m using detail and printed a clear picture for the reader.

            This portfolio represents me as a writer because it shows how passionate I am. My passion drives me to write from the heart. In all my writings I try to inspire the reader or motivate them to be successful at whatever their endeavors. As a person I do like to put others needs above my own and I try incorporate that in my writing. In other words this portfolio represents me as a companionate writer who believes that what he is writing is the truth. There is a downside to this as I don’t care for things that I don’t believe in. It’s hard for me to read, write or whatever I’m doing if I can’t find the motivation to do it. This means that my work can be mediocre from time to time. However most of my work in this portfolio does not represent this flaw for I learned how to motivate myself even if I don’t agree with what I’m writing.

 Reflecting on what I’ve learned by fare my favorite is R.E.N.N.S. Reasons, Examples, Numbers, Names, and Sensory Detail, R.E.N.N.S is the best acronym I use when writing my body paragraphs. It help me focuses and keeps my paragraphs interesting for my readers. Using this I am able to add intense detail to my writing overall improving my essays and other assignments. Another achievement to reflect on is how I was able to break a descent amount of bad habits. I use to never write a strong thesis and my annotating was very harsh. Professor Young changed that when she would go around showing us the correct way to annotate. She also would spend days on how to create a strong thesis. With her help I was able to break these bad habits.

The way I plan on using these skills and experiences from this writing course for other assignments is a simple writer’s check list. (See attached writers check list). This check list is a reminder for myself to use so I don’t forget the skills I’ve learned in order write properly.

Warm regards,

Conner Evans